If We were to be Reborn
by Julissa Sora
Summary: The Kagamine twin lived in the infamous Black Area. While Rin had a health failure, it was Len's responsibility to take care of her. Len loves her so much as he stood still as Rin's shield. But his shield of Aegis will last long to protect her forever? (Sorry for the bad summary)


**IF WE WERE TO BE REBORN**

**Fandom: Vocaloids**

**Rating: K**

**Genre: Hurt, Family**

**Warning: Not beta-edited, some spelling and grammatical errors may be occurred. I am not a medical student and I don't understand how a lung disease works. This disease is my pure imagination.**

**Disclaimer: Vocaloids don't belong to me and you know it.**

**Summary: The Kagamine twin lived in the infamous Black Area. While Rin had a health failure, it was Len's responsibility to take care of her. Len loves her so much as he stood still as Rin's shield. But his shield of Aegis will last long to protect her forever? (Sorry for the bad summary)**

**Julissa: Hope you enjoy. ^_^. **

Cold, harsh wind blew through our old, rotten wooden house, producing rattling sounds nonstop. Several snowflakes entered through the broken wooden window and lied on my worn out bed. I was there, on the bed, hiding myself under the grayish blanket, which used to be white once while protecting from the freezing wind of the winter.

Everything in this house was second-handed. No, scratch that. They were handed on owner from owner until they were thrown away at the dumps. They took them from the dumps and reused.

Reusing was not a strange thing for the people who lived in this area. This area, the Black Area was known to be the poorest, dirtiest part of the country. Things could be found here were houses that had been suffered from many natural and man-made disasters, polluted lands, unclean water, and poor people with handicap or disease. The society referred the residents of this area as rats of the trash heaps. The government had turned their back against us, not caring whether a single one us die or live. This is the very lives of people of this so called 'Black Area'.

I didn't know if we were born in this area or damped here by our parents. As long as I remembered, we had been staying here. When I was young, I went around the area together with my twin brother, Len, looking for some neat trash that could be used in our house or sold for some penny. Normal people would not buy a thing from us, but there were black markets. However the merchants of the black markets would really bully we 'rats', giving us little money for the goods we sold and we could not do a thing.

A few years back, I started to have a rundown of health. My body became fragile, weak against weather, especially the cold. I was suffering from a lung disease I did not know what it's name was. Since then Len would not let me do a thing, shouldering all the living expenses by himself. We did not have enough money for my medicine. In the first place, we did not have a doctor here and no sane doctor would set his foot here so getting treatment from a doctor was just a foolish dream.

I clutched the bed sheet. My knuckles were white like snow. It was getting colder and colder as Christmas had come nearer. I wrapped my pale and thin body in the blanket, trying to create an insulated area between me and the cold wind. My whole body was trembling so much that I could hear the sound of my own two jaws hitting each other. I saw nothing clearly as I was taken over by the cold. The warm air that had left my nostrils danced in front of me, making my vision even more blur.

"Len, where are you? Please come back home safely." I said weakly, but no sound left my mouth. I was already quite dark and he had not come back. "I'm scared." Yes, I was really scared. Scared of the harsh weather, dying, being left behind by Len. I was scared of all of them. To me Len was my precious brother, my one and only priceless treasure in this cruel world. I could not imagine living without him. I shut my eyes tightly, while trying to drive away all those unpleasant ideas that had entered my mind.

"Oh my god, you're as cold as ice. Sorry Rin. I wanted to created more money even if it's little so I can buy this for you." A warm thing, together with two strong arms, wrapped me. I opened my eyes to see Len hugging me tightly. The warm thing he placed in me was a worn out, bluish gray sweater with several stains on it. I embraced him back, resting my head on his shoulder. Len's body was warm.

"I'm home." He said, ruffling my untidy, long blonde hair.

"Welcome back." I replied.

"Hungry?" Len asked me. I shook my head and answered "No." I hugged him tighter. "Let's stay a little longer like this." He said nothing, but gently stroke my head and I fall asleep soon after under his warmth.

**- IF WE WERE TO BE REBORN-**

Bright rays of spring sun showered on my body. It was neither too cold nor too hot. Spring was my favorite weather, but there was any trace of spring like singing birds, newly born leaves or sakura blossoms in the Black Area. I had never seen any sakura flower. Older people once told me that they were really beautiful. Almost every plant could not grow in this contaminated land except for several fungi.

I decided to take a walk since the weather was great. Len would be mad if he knew I had left the house. I understood that he wanted me to stay in the house because of my weak health. However, it was like forever that I was trapped in the old house without having anything to do. I felt bored so I braced myself and stepped outside.

The outside was no pleasant scene. There were heaps of junks, people of different ages, wearing dirty, rugged clothes and some of them were even badly hurt or had serious skin disease. Nasty fluid was leaking from their body. I was happy that I did not have that kind of disease. If that happened, I would never be able to touch Len and that idea alone made my heart hurt so badly.

I decided to go a little further. The air was not fresh enough to inhale, but still better than the stinky air back in the house. Suddenly a yellow thing caught my eyes. It was a yellow wild flower, growing in the piles of broken bricks. I approached it and took it. The flower reminded me of Len. It stood tall in the calamity. I was overjoyed. Len would be happy to see this, too. I hurried home before Len arrived.

A familiar voice appeared from an abandoned house I walked by. It was Len's and his voice was cracked. My foot stopped automatically. I hear another voice, a female voice, to be exact one of our childhood friends, Hatsune Miku's voice.

"Len, don't be sad. It's not your fault." I heard Miku talking. I leaned against the wall to hear clearer. "We can't do anything since we're born like this. Just consider like I've got a better life."

"There's no better life as a black market merchant's mistress!" Len yelled. "How could your father sell his own daughter for money?" I was shocked that did something like this. Tears broke down on my face. "What kind of boyfriend am I if I couldn't protect my own girlfriend?!" This made me even more shocked. Miku was Len's girlfriend? I never knew that. Len had also never told me about that, too.

"Len, I know you're angry, but you still have Rin. Rin needs you. Don't do foolish things like go and challenge the merchant or kill him." Miku comforted Len anger with a clam tone, but I could pick up her trembling voice hidden under the clam one. "I'll be fine. I promise."

"Miku, I'm sorry! I'm sorry that I'm weak! I'm sorry that I don't have money! I'm sorry that I couldn't save you from the misery!" Len's crying voice made me also cried harder. I did not want him to cry. I heard that Miku was also crying now. I tiptoed from the house and came back home quietly.

I placed the flower in a cup and filled it with water and put it on the shabby table. I placed my hands on the table and rested my chin on them. Hot tears leaked from my eyes. I felt terrible. If I had been healthier and more independent and able to stand on my own, Len could be possibly able to get Miku back one way or another. But now, even though he wanted to something he could not do it because me who could be died if he had left. I hated this life. I had fallen asleep after a long period of crying.I did not know how long I was asleep. When I woke up, the sun was already down and Len was already at home.

"Hey," he greeted me. "What a pretty flower." He pointed at the yellow flower in the cup.

"Oh, I found it outside." I said.

"You went outside?"

"Sorry Len. I know that I shouldn't do but it's annoying to stay in the house every day."

"It's okay. I understood. But promise me. Don't do that again. I can take you a walk every night so don't leave the house in the daytime. I don't know what might happen to me if I lose you, too." Len's eyes were full of sorrow and red. He must have been crying for so long. "By the way, Miku's gonna leave this place." He informed me. I felt ashamed that I had eavesdropped. I was burning with guilt.

"I… I… I… I'm sorry, Len." I apologized. He gave me a confused look. "The truth is I overheard your conversation with Miku in the old house." I lowered my head, unable to look him in the eye. He must be angry with me.

"It's that so." His reply was rather blunt.

"Huh? You're not mad at me?" I asked.

"Why would I? In fact, I'm the one to apologize since I didn't tell you about Miku and me. I didn't want you to feel guilty and think you're in the way between us. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, Len. I'm sorry for being a burden." I hugged him and cried. He patted me and comforted me.

"Hey, don't cry." Even though he was the one saying not to cry, I know that he was also crying. That night, we cried like there was no tomorrow.

**- IF WE WERE TO BE REBORN-**

Many days had passed since Miku left us. It was late autumn now. Our lives changed nothing, except my health got worse and our house became more shabby and shabby. Len was out for work today, too and as usual, I was alone at home. I was cooking an onion soup for Len. He seemed to catch a cold lately since I heard him coughing for past week. However, he did not stop working because if he did, we would die from starvation. I was the worst elder sister ever. I could not even make my younger brother happy and be a burden to him.

BAMN!

Our unlocked was kicked opened and Kaito and Meiko rushed in. In Kaito's arms, there was Len, unconscious.

"LEN!" I yelled as Kaito placed him on the bed. "What happened? Len! Len!" I called him over and over again.

"He collapsed." Kaito said.

"What should I do? Kaito, what should I do?" I asked Kaito. My whole body was shaking. My head was full of bad thoughts. 'Don't think about those.' I told myself inwardly.

"We did CPR and brought him back." Kaito told me. I hugged Len while crying.

"Please open your eyes, Len. Please open. I beg you." I said. Meiko sat next to me and comforted me.

"He'll be fine, Rin. He'll be fine. Why don't you let him rest for a while?" Meiko told me.

"Meiko, you don't think he'll be dead, right?"

"Of course, I don't. He'll be fine in the morning. He's the toughest of us after all. It took some time for Meiko and Kaito to comfort me. That night I stayed awake, wishing and praying. Early in the morning, Len was conscious again. He opened his eyes slowly.

"Rin" He called for me.

"Oh my god, Len, are you okay? Is there anything wrong?" I hurriedly asked.

"Water"

"Water, okay. Wait." I stood up to get him a glass of water. I ran and filled a glass with water.

"Rin,"

"Yes, Len."

"I'm sorry. I lied to you."

"Len, you can apologize later."

"No, please listen. Rin, the truth is I…"

"Here's your water, Len." I intercepted him. He drank a little. His eyes started to water. "Len, what's wrong?" I asked him. He cried. His lips were now pale. His skin was, too. He handed me the glass.

"I… I… I also have a lung disease like you. I didn't tell you because you'll be worry. I don't want to die before you, but I realized there's no time left for me." The glass in my hand dropped, met the floor and shattered into pieces.

"Wh… wha… what are you saying, Len? I don't understand." My body was trembling. "It can't be right. It can't be. Len please tell me you're lying. Please tell me it's a lie!" I yelled while my tears were falling down on my face. How could I not notice? How could I?

"I'm sorry, Rin." He looked me in the eyes. "Please come closer. I want to hug you for the last time." I sat down next to him. He hugged me. I hugged him back.

"Len, don't worry. You'll be fine. You'll be fine." I repeatedly told him. He patted me. He pulled away and looked at me.

"Rin, please be strong and survive just like the little flower you found back in spring." He smiled. The light in his eyes was fading.

"LEN?"

"I love you, Rin." He said and kissed me gently on my forhead. "Goodbye." And then there was silent. I looked at him. He was not moving. He was not breathing.

"LENNNNNNNNNNN!"

**- IF WE WERE TO BE REBORN-**

Two months later,

"Hey, Len, I come to see you." I sat in front of his grave. I placed a yellow wild flower on the grave. "Everything is fine. Living at Kaito and Meiko's place is, too. They take extra care of me. Miku visited me. She visited you, too, right? I paused.

"Say, Len, I don't think I can survive without you. I'm not strong like you. I decided to see the last sunset of my life here." A single tear shed.

"If we were to be reborn, it would be nice if we become twins again **(1). **I want to be your strong sister that you can depend on in the next live. Please wait for me." I smiled. I took a deep breath before my last word.

"I LOVE YOU, TOO, LEN."

**That line is from Rin's Regret Message.**


End file.
